Keeping Up Appearances...

I work in a sales environment and therefore I have to dress very conservatively so that I do not distract from the product that I sell. I wear suits and nylons every day at work. It can be a pain, but unfortunately people do care about what I look like. I enjoy my job and so I must conform, even though I would prefer to wear sweats. Which brings me to my topic today of how much do we judge other's appearance and make assumptions?

Both of my parents attended Brigham Young University in Provo and Hawaii. My mother earned a masters degree in library science and is very well read. She received her degrees in a language that is not her native tongue. To this day she is very self-conscientious of her accent and her English diction is better than most Americans who are raised with English as their first and only language. It annoys me when I go to places with her and as soon as people see her and hear an accent they automatically assume they can not understand her. I will illustrate a point by using a personal experience with an Aunt of mine.

My Aunt was coming to Salt Lake City to visit and attend a conference. I work in a downtown hotel and therefore I invited her to stay at my hotel instead of where the conference was being held. My aunt has a Ph.D. She is fluent in English and Tongan. She was checking into the hotel and speaking to her brother who lives in Salt Lake in Tongan. Whether they didn't notice that they were at the counter or what happened prior to coming to the counter, I don't know. The front desk agent began to speak loudly...and slowly.

"DO YOU HAVE A RES-ER-VA-TION?" To which they replied with an odd look at her,
"Yes." they gave her their confirmation number and credit card. They must have begun speaking in Tongan again. Because from what I heard, she began to motion in large sweeping hand movements. "YOU NEED TO SIGN." They signed and started laughing. My friend who supervised the front desk came and spoke to her afterwards and apologized to me. She told me that my aunt spoke perfect English, with a slight British accent (most Tongans in Tonga have British or New Zealanders as teachers and it is mandatory to speak only English in schools). I suppose the agent only saw and heard what she wanted to hear. I was horrified, my Aunt just laughed when I apologized, she said it was no big deal.

My favorite line in the movie Selena, is when she is discussing with her father what growing up in America is like versus Mexico. Her father tells her "Just because I speak with an accent doesn't mean I think with an accent." I try to avoid making judgements on people based on appearance, however I am human. What about you?